Many of you know that I start my weekdays getting up around 7 to do my household chores (i.e. getting Barney his breakfast and morning pee...not always in that order) and then getting out the door to participate in our offseason workouts. So, I'm always looking forward to the weekends where I can sleep in until 8 (that's when Barney wakes me up) and basically relax the day away. This weekend I had planned on more of the same. Unfortunately, I had forgotten that Laura's 10K was this weekend, so when Saturday rolled around I was greeted by a 6:15 alarm. Laura hopped out of bed and into the bathroom to get ready. Barney and I decided it was too early and continued sleeping. 6:15 turned into 6:45 and still neither one of the Jansen boys had move. (We don't get up until 7.) Finally, I rolled out of bed, put on a signature gray T-shirt, a sweatshirt and the same white shorts I had worn for two days in a row and got into the car to drive Laura to the race.
When we got the race, we quickly realized that we were both a little under dressed given the 35 degree morning temp. I knew Laura would be fine once she started running, but I knew I would need something to warm me up and I certainly wasn't going to be doing any running. I decided maybe some early morning tea might do the trick, so I planned on making a Starbucks run once Laura began the race. More on this in a second...
As we approached the starting line, I noticed that everybody seemed to have on either an orange or white number, signifying which race they'd be running in. Everyone except me. I quickly realized that either no body else was dumb enough to wake up at 6 in the morning on a Saturday to run a race in the freezing temperatures, or I was the only person lazy enough to show up and not want to run. Either way, I wasn't off to a good start.
Laura began warming up. Being an elite athlete myself, I offered up some suggestions as to what she might do in her warmup. I, of course, figured that she would be quite receptive to some stretching routines used at Bank of America Stadium each and every morning. She looked at me, seemed to take in everything I had suggested and then said, "Thanks so much baby, but I think those years of track, volleyball and months of training for half-marathons and 10Ks have probably taught me a thing or two about warming up. I think I'll be okay!" And with that she tap me sarcastically on the shoulder twice and began her light jogging and stretching.
Now being professionally demoralized and with Laura making her final preparations, I began to survey all the competitors and handicap the field...
The Favorites:
The two Kenyans: Draped in green and gold, both of these young men looked destined for a great run. Of course this was probably a training run for a full marathon, so I fully expected them to do well.
Really amped up guy: As the named suggests, this twenty-something gentleman was near the start of the line, and really roaring to go (something tells me he took off sprinting, feeling really good about himself until he threw up his 8th Red Bull of the morning at mile marker 3.
The Dark Horses:
Cougar Town: A young girl in her early twenties, looking fit and ready to go. However, she chose to wear a leopard-print skirt to the race with a tank-top. Laura and I were both speechless.
You Can Run With Us: A pack of 40 or 50-somethings holding up a sign that indicated that they were planning on running 12 minute miles. They seemed really friendly, even letting others know that "you can run with us." I never saw them finish.
With the field handicapped and Laura ready to go the starting line, I decided to warm up a bit by going to get my tea. I arrived at Starbucks and spent 10 minutes trying to get a tea (even though I was the only one in the store) because the three baristas all kept trying to explain to me which teas had caffeine, which ones were herbal, which ones were organic, which ones were from South America, North America, Europe, which ones were good for morning, which ones should be drank with milk, sugar, honey, etc. Needless to say, I just wanted the Awake tea that I had come in for. (I never should of asked if they could recommend something for me).
Now with my tea firmly in my hand and 10 minutes of my life I'll never get back, I drove back to the race and walked towards the start finish line. It was about 8:15 and I knew Laura's 10-minute mile pace would have her finishing around 8:30. The walk from the parking lot was a little further than I expected and I began to get a bit nauseous...no joke.
At the finish line, many of the fastest runners had come in and were celebrating with friends and family and it made me really excited to be there when Laura finished. Meanwhile, I could barely stand from the nausea. As Laura approached I got a rush of adrenaline and watched her power through the finish line with a time of 59:17. An average mile time of 9:43. Laura had beat both of her goals, 10-minute miles and under 1 hour. I was so proud of her. Unfortunately, I was the one still literally sick to my stomach.
As Laura took a cool down walk, I had to duck behind a trailer to avoid being out of sight in case I threw up. All I could tell myself was "don't throw up in front of people who just ran between 6 and 13 miles this morning." I even went over to the refreshments table and ate the oranges, bananas and bagels laid out for the racers.
Finally, after 45 minutes of nausea and almost throwing up on 3 separate occasions, I was able to work up the energy to actually tell Laura that I was feeling sick to my stomach. When she asked me what I had ate, I told her nothing except for the tea. She started laughing. I didn't find it amusing. Then she told me that the acids in teas make you sick to your stomach if you don't eat. I still didn't find it that amusing, but at least she'd figured out the problem for me. Needless to say I'm glad she had because if I had kept drinking that tea I surely would've been the one that all the racers would've been telling each other, "look at that guy over there with his head in the trash can, he must've run really hard." And they wouldn't have been further from the truth...
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